The Day I Got My Parade

So any of you who attended my CD release concert heard me talk about my recent dental situation. I’ve never really been one to floss on a regular basis, instead opting to floss twice a day for a week before my 6 month visits. Every time I go to the dentist, the hygienist asks me if I’m flossing and I try to come up with a clever way of saying yes without having to lie about it, knowing full well that she sees thru my thinly veiled attempt at dental deception. But then I decided it was time for a change.

At my cleaning 6 months ago, I was in the midst of writing a new song which would eventually become the title track from my new CD, “Resolution”. The chorus lyrics say, “Every day’s a brand new chance to pick another tune to dance to, or just start over. Leave behind procrastinating; no excuse is worth the waiting. Today’s the day for a resolution.” So that day, I determined to floss every single day at least until my next checkup.

I told this story at my concert, which was fitting because I had my cleaning scheduled for the following day. Unfortunately, I knew that although I had been successful in keeping my resolution of flossing every day for six months, I knew when it came up in conversation with the hygienist, she wouldn’t be nearly as impressed with me as I was with myself. That night I told everyone that though I was expecting some mild accolades, I was secretly hoping for a grandiose gesture of approval and amazement; I deserved a parade! (yes, for flossing my teeth)

The next morning I was informed they needed to reschedule, so I set the appointment for 2 weeks later, knowing it must have been very inconvenient to the marching band, acrobats, and circus clowns who must have been standing by to surprise me. When the two weeks were up, my emotional Macy’s Thanksgiving Day balloon was quickly deflated at the following conversation with the hygienist.

“So, have you been flossing?”


“Great, let’s get those teeth cleaned.”

What! All I get is a “great?” Where’s my spectacle? What happened to the cavalcade of pop stars lip-synching songs of congratulations and amazement? Where’s my parade? Oh well, the satisfaction of healthy gums would have to be enough.

But then something funny happened. The next day I was already planning on attending the grand opening of the new Galleria Drive overpass and exit off the 515/93/95 freeway (yes, it ridiculously has 3 names and should probably star in Doogie Howser, MD or Sex and the City). So I showed up with my friends and coworkers from Central to celebrate the extra one and a half minutes of sleep I’d now be able to claim.


To my surprise, upon arriving, I found out that those of us from Central were to be given mustard-colored commemorative t-shirts to wear as we marched in a parade as a part of the festivities!

As I stood behind the marching band, waiting to march across the bridge, I couldn’t help but remember the parade I jokingly wanted the day before. I mean really! How many times in your life, whether or not in jest, have you said you wanted a parade in your honor? And how many times have you marched in a parade? Almost exactly 24 hours after I missed out on my parade, I was marching in one, pretending it was a celebration of the merits of daily flossing, and utterly joyous in my self-deception.

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One Response to The Day I Got My Parade

  1. heids124 says:

    I want to march in a parade with Neil Patrick Harris and Sarah Jessica Parker.

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